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Another Voice

For The Love Of Your Life – 02nd December, 2011

You just can’t sleep, you can’t think beyond that person and you see his/her face everywhere you turn around, and you get into these funny mental dialogues with that one person who is slowly engulfing you into his/her world! It is tortuous and enlivening, at the same time. But, why does romance die after marriage, over a period of time – or does it? >> More

Happy Anniversary – 17th November, 2011

People have anniversaries for everything – right from the pet dog entering the little sister’s room for the first time to going out to that movie for the first time with their partner. And anniversaries are just celebrations. Man from time immemorial has been celebrating anniversaries. The cave men and the Neanderthals celebrated the beginning and end of good weather. Life was tough those days, and if you survive for one season, then there is reason to celebrate. >> More

Civilized, are we? – 28th October, 2011

Why do successive governments ignore the senior citizens. I see roads that are so unfriendly to pedestrians, more so for senior citizens – Long roads with beautified medians, where they have to walk all the way down to take a u-turn, just like motorized vehicles, only to get to the opposite side of a road. I see public transport with high rise steps, making it difficult for them to climb up, when their joints and knees are already reeling under pain. What is expected of senior citizens – just wind up on living and play vegetable? >> More

Are we all addicts? – 20th October, 2011

If you do something too much at expected time-frames, is it addiction? There are all kinds of addicts viz., those who are kicked into alcohol, smoking, drugs, sugar, chocolate et al. This is only substance addiction. But there are also addicts to a certain behaviour or activity. In fact behaviour and activity-based addictions can be hard to define as a problem and will make it easier for the person to assume that it is a very normal thing to do…and stay addicted for life. One can suffer from anorexia(eating disorder), bulimia(disorder eating), binge eating, sympathy-seeking, exercise, shopping, work, gambling, sex, pornography, internet, television, coffee or tea, computer games or gaming…the list seems endless, as we evolve and try to fit into being accepted by our immediate societal expectations. >> More

Just a Coincidence? – 29th September, 2011

Are coincidences meaningful?  Yes, they are a mystery, but we all have a way of experiencing them. It is a very personal thing, but it is often considered to be bizarre or just a manipulated fact, for others who are not part of it. But most stories about coincidences are mind-blowing, even to the parapsychologists who study these things for a living.>> More

On Being Polite – 22nd September, 2011

I wonder why, we as a society are becoming completely intolerant for the civilities of life? Are urban Indians much ruder these days than they were a decade back? Have we changed so much that the western philosophy of instant gratification and intolerance, have now seeped into our “denimised” culture?  Why it is so hard to be polite? Why is it harder to see someone being polite in a completely unassuming way? Why is being polite seen as a sign of weakness and not strength?   >> More

Choices and Expectations – 15th September, 2011

Today, in an all-consuming consumer era, people are looking for instant gratification. Most people get into relationships with the expectation that the other person has the potential to keep them happy. If he/she is not taking the effort to keep them happy, then they immediately get self-centric, think if their needs are being met and if not then they start looking at the list of choices. They never understand that it takes two people to tango. They often believe that only the other person is responsible for mistakes. It is almost always about, how one feels and not what one does.    >> More

Indian Women In Indian Prisons – 09th September, 2011

Why are we as a society so inhuman to women? There are crimes committed against them within the confines of home, there are crimes committed against them on roads, in workplaces in public places and everywhere conceivable. And if their reaction to save themselves is considered crime, they land up in prisons – And there is more crime committed against them, within prisons!  >> More

The Ganesha Of Our Mind – 02nd September, 2011

If you are someone who is yearning to get beyond material acquisitions, Ganesha, also known as “obstacle remover,” is an energy point who will empower you to take control of things and quash the obstacles that come your way and help you achieve your goals. And that is something most people seek in right earnest, all their lives, because every passing day brings better opportunities and also crouching along come greater challenges.   >> More

Work-Life Balance – Is it a myth? – 26th August, 2011

The pace of life and the highs and lows of it always makes me wonder if this thing called “balance” is but a myth! Is there something that the “work” and “life” compartments can teach each other, to achieve this balance?  >> More

Anna In Thangachi Land – 18th August, 2011

Hiding behind laptops and responsibilities of the family, why are today’s urban Indian women shying away from the responsibility of being good citizens first. Because we think that two full spoons of passivity, with one large measure of apathy and a dash of corruption will make the perfect recipe for peace at home. And, no our mothers didn’t teach us these values. We picked it up somewhere down the years of battered lives, and so we turned blind to all the corruption around us, that we unconsciously feed.  >> More

Meditation – The Centering Exercise – 12th August, 2011

People who meditate these days come from all walks of life and aren’t necessarily weird New Agers or pretentious actors. Students, lawyers, home makers, athletes, prisoners, and government officials all meditate. It’s supposed to help depression, control pain, increase longevity, slow down cancers, invigorate the immune system, and significantly reduce blood pressure, prevent heart conditions and infertility. >> More

Mentoring Success – 04th August, 2011

Women in India have always had some level of mentoring and informal coaches, in the form of elders in the family, teachers and spiritual gurus, though they were never seen as mentors. But in today’s global marketplace, work-life balance and career aspirations are a bigger challenge for qualified Indian woman who aspire to fast-track their careers, and there is none they can turn to. Seeking a suitable mentor could be the answer. >> More

It’s Money, Honey – 29th July, 2011

Money is most often the bone of contention with most working couples. Stereo types and expectations associated with gender roles creep-in to managing money, and every modern-day couple have fought over money, many times during holy matrimony. But, how do smart couples manage their money issues? >> More

God Men and We, The Women – 21st July, 2011

Women have this innate quality of getting attracted to God men, like iron filings to a magnet, like a swarm of bees heading back to their honey comb, like a bunch of stinging mosquitoes resting on sewerage water – Yes, that’s how much the attraction is, but that is also pretty much the same characteristics that these God men and women carry. Why do we do that? – To find a conduit for our prayers? Or find short cut prayers to realize real-world goals? >> More

Burn Your Bridges 14th July, 2011

Most people in the corporate world ask you not to burn your bridges, a phrase that advises you not to harm or destroy relationships because you may need to come back to them later in life or you may need their good word someday – this is so true of bosses! This English phrase probably had a military origin – more of a strategic advice that once you burn your bridges behind, you may not have an escape route, if you are cornered by the enemy. It is so very true, even in the corporate world when dealing with relationships – it is always better to have an escape route, if you are caught in a dead-end.  But sometimes, if you want to fly, you must be willing to burn your bridges. >> More

Ah…Love – The Forbidden One 07th July, 2011

We find it utterly perfect to live in loveless marriages, spread absolute treason and treachery, play those mind-control games within our homes, become redundant as human beings to each other and at some level become habitual victims that we can’t let go of our abusers.  We sincerely believe that everything else in life deserves our time, our effort, our honourable intentions and our mind, except discovering our true selves. Why do we do this? Is this a cultural malady? Why is falling in love, at any age, considered a bad thing? Is there anything called right love and wrong love?>> More

Surviving Betrayal 25th June, 2011

Being warm and lovable is what comes naturally to every woman. But if these traits are lost, then those are the biggest losses for her. Betrayal shifts the way she processes information and relationships. This not only affects how she treats others, but also the way she treats her own feelings as self-esteem plunges to a low. So, does this mean that women cannot cope with betrayal? >> More

Humour – The best is yet to come 16th June, 2011

Humour is the next best thing to being a woman – yes it is, only if you are willing to take yourself not too seriously. Because anyway, nobody does. So why bother? Indian women get so pent up with emotions and there is this tendency to fit into stereotypical descriptions of who we are supposed to be – It’s not just the men who fit us into slots, we beat them at it. We try hard to fit ourselves into these numerous slots that the media and the rest of the woman’s world has taken the trouble to weave about us and our reactions. We try hard to remain too serious about life and even if a situation demands us to just relax we look around wondering if it is okay to relax.  >> More

Sophistication -“Simplicity” or Simply Nothing?09th June, 2011

Sophistication is not about beauty alone, but a lot about simplicity. It is about poise, refined tastes, confidence and its expression. It is an expression of quality and the desire to own and display the best, at all times. This includes seeking sophistication in the things we use, the way we carry ourselves, the way we run our lives and the way we tune our thought processes.  For a woman, sophistication is the natural next step that allows her to blossom into her own space, beautifully. >> More

Insults – Be Smart Enough To Smile – 02nd June, 2011

Insults!! Hmmm….they do make life interesting; life worth the challenge, if they are not hurled at you. And if you are the one throwing it on someone, they can not only make you a wily show-stopper, but can even showcase your individuality. Being insulting in a civilized form, is an art. Insulting can often serve as a powerful tool for the forthright and the articulate. >> More

Stalking – Combat the Crime – 26th May, 2011

Psychologically, being stalked can be traumatic on a woman, when she is indirectly being controlled, against her freedom and free will. Indian women have a clouded vision of such erratic behaviour. For some, her man is in “love” with her. For a few others, “he is so possessive about me.” For a few more, “it is sheer nonsense.” For a larger percentage, “it is threatening and I am getting paranoid.” So clear your lenses, wake up and be aware that stalking is a serious crime. It is a crime against you, and makes you feel vulnerable and completely exposed, as stalkers can turn violent anytime. How do you take care of yourself? >> More

The Voice of Self-Expression  – 19th May, 2011

Expressions make life. What you say, how you say, the context in which you say something, your body language, what you are wearing, and whom you are addressing – everything matters. Expression is what makes you THE person, to the rest of the world. Most women understand this instinctively, because they build their self-images around “the others” acceptance. But how do we develop our unique voice of self-expression >> More

Motherhood – The Creator Within – 12th May, 2011

No doubt motherhood makes a woman complete. It helps a woman realize that she is the creator and she is the nurturer. It gives an extra-ordinary purpose to this life that nothing else can beat the feeling of being a mother. It makes a woman understand the very virtues that she is naturally endowed with, and which have been lying dormant. But are all women capable of taking on Motherhood? >> More

Take Off That Badge – 05th May, 2011

Romanticizing is very natural to all of us. Given a sneaky chance, we crawl into conversations and would love to add that word about us, “I am like that. I am like this” – that one word we believe, defines us to the world. We have to talk about what we do, how we do and why we do. We love to talk about ourselves – our ideas, our commitments, our causes, our efforts, our benevolence, our pursuits and even our so-called humility…….the list is endless – Quite simply, whether our audience is cued to us or not, we have to scream about our place in the universe. Have you ever wondered why we all do that? >> More

Celebrate Food – It is your key to vitality – 28th April, 2011

You know what? Weight loss programs, products, and potions don’t work! It is not even that they don’t work, they can’t work! The typical weight loss program goes against human physiology and the way our bodies are designed to work. They are in a sense physiologically incorrect. The typical weight loss program is based on steady caloric reduction, which enables the body to lose weight. But do you really lose fat? Not entirely. So is there no meaning to urban India’s fad with fast-food restaurants and diet cokes; quick bites and sauna belts; health foods and slimming centers, not to forget those anorexic beauties and air-brushed and photoshopped magazine cover girls.. Find out… >> More

Power it up with Responsibility 21st Apr, 2011

“Grow up. Take responsibility!” This is something we all grew up listening to. Curiously, this world always wanted us to “grow up” when we were young, and wants us to “look at the world with a child’s eyes,” when we have become adults. Someone or the other is often telling us to take responsibility for our actions, yet enjoy life – the way they define “enjoyment.” What is this feeling of being “responsible?” What does it entail, and why does a society (your immediate world and the world at large) always insist on responsibility as a trait that will keep things in order? Do we all fit into standard slots of “good,” “bad,” and “worse” or is there something more to our exhibited behaviour?  >> More

Success Is About Following Your Gut Feeling 14th Apr, 2011

When we are at cross-roads of making a decision, our inner voice will be there to guide us, but with education and exposure to necessities of life, we just brush aside this inner voice. We replace it with logic and reasoning and the head takes over decision-making, and then we find that the end results are not what we wanted. Without intuition, we are just super-computers and flowcharts, bringing logical reasoning into our lives, following Step1, Step2, Step3 and Yes or No decision-making. Why do we do that? >> More

Small Things Are just Small 07th Apr, 2011

Are you one of those perfectionists who frets over small things? Then, calm down and take a look at yourself. Are you God of all small things who frets over mundane idiocy or are you really the perfect one? When no one can be perfect, why do you expect perfection from everybody and everything around you? How do you overcome these petty annoyances in every day life?>> More

The Games We Play 31st Mar, 2011

Most situations in our lives are built around games that people play – either we play it along, or we choose to stay away from a few “actors” or “players” but there is no running away from the games people play.  In a life spent killing time over “games” and co-actors, you must become aware of the games people play, so that you can choose – choose your roles, choose your co-actors and choose when you want to exit a game.  Becoming aware of the games people play will help us build our responses to the other “actors” or “players’ in our life and work towards better outcomes for us, that promise a more satisfying life.  >> More

Problems, Fear And Smiles 24th Mar, 2011

When you listen or analyze others’ problems, you begin to see that your own problems are nothing but “accumulated fears and insecurities.” Without an analysis from your side, when you add ingredients like “fear” to a problem, your body and mind start “reacting” to your inputs.  Your body triggers all associated reactions viz., anxiety, depression, worry, panic and dread. This whole cycle is just a series of physiological symptoms, whereas you may believe that your “problem” is creating these reactions in you.  Learn to throw away fear, rise above circumstances and live your true passions. >> More

Women Mean Business 17th Mar, 2011

How many times have you cried at your workplace? I have – Once, in all my years of career, and that is when I decided that the place was not worth staying and crying over. In less than a month after that, I found a better assignment and moved out. But I’ve seen a lot of women crying and putting up with issues at the workplace.  Is it professional to cry at the workplace? >> More

Sweet Dreams Are Made of These 10th Mar, 2011

We all grew up listening, reading and fantasizing about our own prince charming, who will redeem us from our present situations.  This feeling that a man is the solution to all her problems is universal, with women. It has nothing to do with the man, but with the way, a woman looks at herself and her worth. >> More

I, Inspire 03rd Mar, 2011

Everything you say, do and react to, are important to you. Consider your most happy, sad and emotionally draining moments – It would invariably involve YOU, as the center of the event that unfolded the emotion. For everyone, I, ME, MYSELF comes first. Despite all the holy books asking you to shed your ego and forget the self, I think, you should continue with your I, ME, MYSELF trip of life for 3 reasons.  >> More

Endurance Is About Taking Care – 24th Feb, 2011

Loneliness and improper choice of a companion can create abusive relationships that lead to psychological disorders affecting the way you live, work and communicate. It can lead to physical ailments, trauma, emotional disorders and lowered self-esteem. When this happens within the family or with an intimate partner, you spread your trauma to your child as well.  But, do we all choose the right companion? Do we build communities that support us, in our actions and aspirations? >> More

Wear What Fits You – 17th Feb, 2011

Workplace issues for white collar women in India are pretty complex. It is a fact that career advancement for ambitious women is hard to come by, in a male-skewed corporate world. The Indira Nooyis(Chief of Pepsi Co), the Chanda Kocchars(Head, ICICI Bank) and Shika Sharmas(CEO, Axis Bank) are far and few in number, though there is no such thing as glass ceiling in India. Is this a consequence of women not wanting to upscale, or is this an outcome of a system that suppresses you?  >> More

Don’t Strive To Arrive10th Feb, 2011

To most women, “settling” is all about getting married, having children, owing a home, acquiring assets, managing family life and advancing professionally. Some of you come from families, where your parents decide on what is best for you, and they define your milestones and processes to “arrive” and “settle” – right from whom to marry, when to buy that first house, when to plan for a family and how to manage your assets. Some of you would’ve tread your own paths, but you too are not spared from the expectations of “arriving” or “settling.”

But does any of this make sense to you, as a person?   >> More

I live life only MY way! – 03rd Feb, 2011

How many times have you searched for that “something” on your desk? How many times have you found it frustrating to keep looking for something, when actually you have to be doing something? A missing pen, a missing roster, a missing address book – they are somewhere there, but go missing when you actually need them. A place for everything and everything in its place should be your mantra.    Simply put, life is about reorganization. When you can reorganize your moments, you are in control of your life, and begin to enjoy the greater gratification of living it.  >> More

Today is yours – All yours! – 27th Jan, 2011

Once the Prime Minster of Tang Dynasty, a great Zen thought leader and a devout Buddhist, was approached by a poor man. Unfortunately for him, his timing was bad. The Prime Minister was hurrying to keep his weekly appointment with his master, and he simply asked the poor man to come back the next day, and solicit whatever he wanted. While the poor man left disappointed, the Prime Minister was happy that he could meet his master, on time. As he entered the master’s chamber, there was great commotion.  >> More

Be Crazy – It’s Okay! – 20th Jan, 2011

Our personal life is a series of events, where we respond to things the way others think it is supposed to be done. Whether it is a particular recipe, a flower arrangement, the way you drape your sari, the way you pair up your formals for meetings, the specific knots of your scarf, even your relationships and the way you are supposed to respond to them – everything has to be in the same way that someone else has already decided, decoded and summarized as the “good,” the “bad” and the “ugly.” >> More

Love. Don’t Suffer! – 14th Jan, 2011

Most middle class Indian women are brought up to believe that tolerance is what makes her perfect. Tolerance in other words, translates to suffering. “The more you suffer the greater and better you become, at being a woman” – a thought seed that got implanted many generations ago, and which is now wired into your genetic code. Whoever started this and perpetuated the thought, it certainly is a parochial and male-centric view to control women as just one more of their possessions. But this has to change, if a woman has to change the way she takes on her life. >> More



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